A S H Smyth

. We call our day 24 hours, but it is really 23 hours 56 minutes 5 seconds. — The Nelson Evening Mail, September 28 1906 . ‘Facetious’ is the shortest word in the English language including all the vowels in alphabetical order. The English theatre loves the joker. Samuel Beckett notched up 35 runs in first-class cricket. UK funeral directors are […]

. Electricity is now used to improve the complexion. — The Nelson Evening Mail, July 4 1908 . The Chinese Christian warlord Feng Yu-xiang (1882–1948) baptised his troops en masse, using a firehose. Vincent Kompany has suffered more than 40 injuries. Time passes very slowly when you’re in a hippo’s mouth. Poetry must be entered into by a personal encounter, or […]

. There are more Jews in New York than there are in Germany, Great Britain, France, Italy, Spain, and Switzerland put together. They worship in 37 synagogues. Every fifth person belongs to the family of Abraham. — The Nelson Evening Mail, December 1 1906   . Coleraine Blackjack is the cheapest porter in the world. Thomas Nelson […]

. High top boots for dogs are now being sold in the shops of New York. — The Nelson Evening Mail, January 23 1907 . The first pedestrian has been killed by a self-driving car. Starbucks employees do not capitalise their As. The sound of the bagpipe fattens the sheep and lambs of all Arabia. […]