A S H Smyth

.
From the deepest pit we may see the stars.

— The Nelson Evening Mail, August 28 1906

.
Armadillos are incapable of irony.

Greek prostitutes bill their clients in six-minute units.

One of the stars of early-Nineties cult TV show Twin Peaks was called Suburbis Polaski.

It is rarely useful to have studied Latin.

A ‘wineglassful’ is an official unit of measurement among apothecaries.

The youngest woman to achieve the title of Grandmaster of chess was India’s Humpy Koneru. Her first name is a contracted form of ‘champion’.

It is difficult to dry your hair in a Dyson Airblade™.

Children blink about 5 million times a year.

Vegetal, celery-like, ham-like, or soapy flavours are inappropriate.

There are only 25 real tennis courts in the UK, and 45 worldwide.

A car for sale in Nelson, New Zealand, probably won’t be bought after it burst into flames during a test drive.

Call The Midwife‘s Helen used to be afraid of Trevor Nunn.

In China, eggs are cooked in the urine of young boys.