A S H Smyth › “Festooned with Saxons” – or; How great-grandfather won the Triple Crown

Skip to content

Tag Archives: humour

“Festooned with Saxons” – or; How great-grandfather won the Triple Crown

Friday, March 16, 2018

‘If success does not throw the Irishmen off their balance, they may go on winning and winning until the height of a season’s ambition may be attained.’ — Athletic News and Cyclists’ Journal, 3 February 1896 . When it comes to the 6 Nations, in recent years the fixtures guys have done well making sure […]

Filed in correspondence, Journalism | Also tagged 6 Nations Championship, Australia, barristers, Brian Moore, British and Irish Lions, Cardiff Arms Park, cricket, debuts, Douglas Hyde, Dublin, embroidery, England, France, French Foreign Legion, gloves, golf, Grand Slam, Guinnness, hockey, Ireland, Irish Rugby Football Union, Italy, James Sealy, Journalism, judges, justice, King's Counsel, law, Marylebone Cricket Club in Ireland, Oliver Cromwell, painting, Poetry, politics, religion, Robert Johnstone, rugby, Samuel Beckett, Sarah Purser, Saxons, Scotland, Second Boer War, South Africa, sport, St Patrick's Day, tea, The Athletic News and Cyclists' Journal, the Fates, The Times, Tom Crean, Trinity College Dublin, Triple Crown, Ulster, Una Hyde, Victoria Cross, Wales, Yeats | Comments (3)

On ranting

Thursday, February 1, 2018

If there’s one thing I just can’t abide, it’s ranters. Not the C17th religious nonconformists. Folk who can’t shut up about things. You know the type. The workplace philosophers; the shouters at the TV; people in whose eyes you see the glint of socialist dictatorship. They come in every walk of life. Stupid boxers (*tautology […]

Filed in correspondence, Journalism | Also tagged Adolf Hitler, Alex Ferguson, Bangalore, Basil Fawlty, boxers, British Rail, Charlie Sheen, comedians, customer services, Denmark, dictatorship, Donald Trump, fathers, Geoffrey Boycott, Hamlet, Jeremy Clarkson, John McEnroe, Mel Gibson, memoirs, men, Michael Richards, Naomi Campbell, philosophy, phones, pubs, ranting, religion, Samuel Johnson, socialism, The Daily Mail, the Labour Party, The Oldie, TV, Will Self | Comments (0)

NEWS AT A GLANCE

Monday, September 4, 2017

. The typewriter is more largely used in Mexico than in France. — The Nelson Evening Mail, August 2 1906 . In 1943 a British pilot made an emergency landing on the Italian island of Lampedusa, only to have it surrender to him. Kelo trees live for up to 3,500 years, and remain standing for another 700. […]

Filed in Journalism, NEWS AT A GLANCE | Also tagged air travel, arachnids, Arthur C Clarke, coffee, death, dictionaries, Egypt, electricity, food, France, fruit, Italy, José Mauricio Nunes Garcia, Manchester, marketing, Mexico, Michael Jackson, Mozart, music, Nelson Evening Mail, painting, Pliny the Elder, politics, Spinal Tap, the Labour Party, trees, typewriters, Walliston, war | Comments (0)

NEWS AT A GLANCE

Monday, February 6, 2017

. The telephone has a tendency to render the girl operators left-eared. — The Nelson Evening Mail, July 4 1908 . Eight wickets for eight runs is the worst batting collapse in Twenty20 international cricket. St Blaise is the patron saint of sore throats, and of knitting. Estonian literature suffers from a dearth of stories […]

Filed in Journalism, NEWS AT A GLANCE | Also tagged Chaucer, Chrysippus, cricket, drink, driving, Estonia, health, history, information, Japan, knitting, law, literature, Mount Rushmore, Nelson Evening Mail, Nixon, novels, phones, politics, Samuel Derrick, science, Secret Service, sex, Shakespeare, St Blaise, statuary, toilets, tramps, turnips | Comments (0)

The Top Fifteen Or So Wittiest Oscar Wilde Quotes – according to his Twitter output (last 24hrs)

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

1) ‘Think tattoos have to be bold and dark? Think again! Check out these stunning white ink tats!’ 2) ‘You can’t get your childhood back but you can recreate it! Check out these awesome recreation photos.’ 3) ‘Wanna see a real-life Barbie doll? This is not Photoshopped! You’ve gotta see this to believe it’ 4) […]

Filed in Non-fictions | Also tagged Barbie, foxes, girlfriends, kissing, marriage, men, Miley Cyrus, Morrissey, New York Jets, Oscar Wilde, photography, Photoshop, piercings, pregnancy, tattoos, Taylor Swift, technology, the internet, The Pikey Laureate, women | Comments (0)

How d’you make a Maltese cross?

Friday, October 9, 2015

Fuck his missus.

Filed in Jokes | Also tagged Malta, men, sex, women | Comments (0)

Eine subtitled mississippianische Re-post (nach Williams)

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Have you read Humorous Elements in the Short Stories and Novels of the Southern Writer Eudora Welty … in German? Ja, Darling! — * a (reverse) translation of Jonathan Williams’ ‘A Subtle Mississippian Riposte (for L.Z.)’ in Louis Zukofsky, or whoever someone else thought he was: a collection of responses to the work of Louis […]

Filed in Poetry, Translation | Also tagged America, English, Eudora Welty, German, Harry Gilonis, Jonathan Williams, Louis Zukofsky, Mississippi, novels, short stories | Comments (1)

Joke

Monday, March 3, 2014

A cafetière falls down the stairs. *¡Bodum CRASH!*

Filed in Fictions | Also tagged coffee, micro-fiction | Comments (0)

TS Eliot’s MO

Friday, April 20, 2012

I drop ice-cubes down the vests of those who can’t follow my pop-literary references.

Filed in Poetry | Also tagged Blackadder, Eliot, Poetry | Comments (0)